cg360's Submission

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cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Wed Sep 08, 2010 7:52 pm

^^ "The length of the title for this topic must be ranging between 10 and 255 characters" ^^

Hi everyone!, I read Mimi's post about the competition and thought I'd put my songwriting to good use. I wrote this song, entitled "MoonChild (Alive)", on 26 Aug, but I have finally gotten the courage to post it. This is a major step for me, in my opinion. I'm very proud of myself for finally gathering up this courage. I understand that it's supposed to be along the lines of a potion, but I couldn't force it. Songwriting is what I feel I'm somewhat good at, and I thought that I'd just do this, for fun. The song is about all three Moonmarks but, I'd like to think, focuses on Integrity the most out of the three Moonmarks; it focuses on how we need to thrive from a humble personality and environment. I imagine it as a harder, more guitar-driven song than I'm used to writing. It's definitely a risk for me, but - as I wrote before - this is a major step for me, and I'm very pleased with myself for summoning the courage to post. I'm confused about whether the cover letter or the actual submission is supposed to be within 200-300 words; I'll wait to send in the cover letter and/or further edit the song until I know for sure. Be honest with me on how I've done! I need honest feedback in order to get better Smile So, *excited sigh* here it is:

"MoonChild (Alive)"

VERSE 1
Integrity, love and unity/ The three components of a new me/ The new generation followed me into the depths of the unseen/ They followed me, but I delayed to believe

PRE-CHORUS
Love is in my heart/ Unity, my mind/ Integrity, keep it coarsing through these veins, all the time/ Through my body/ You keep me alive
CHORUS
You keep me alive/ Alive/ You keep me alive

VERSE 2
Down to earth/ Your soul and mine, we are connected/ Humans who can feel/ Humans who breathe/ The basic components/ The puzzle to the machine/ Built from scratch/ But predestined to make our own destinies

(repeat pre-chorus and chorus)

BRIDGE
Blood roars through my head/ Am I alive or dead (Am I dead?)/ (Don't wanna be) Waking up with dread/ Yes, it fills my head/ I need you here with me/ We'll shelter in the unseen/ I need you here with me, tonight/ To keep me alive

(repeat chorus) Will you keep me alive?

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by PROUDLIKECOW on Wed Sep 08, 2010 9:15 pm

cg360, this song is awfully, awesome! The only complaint I would raise up is the hesitancy that makes this song so good. It reminds me of the adage, "think before you speak," and that meditation resonates loudly as you check your blood for poison! It reveals not only your own wonderfully developed mind, but also your concern for others to see that in themselves.

Your posts tell me you might be "too" familiar with the phrase, "the fool is known as he opens his mouth." You are no fool! Don't be scared into dimming that mouthpiece!
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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Thu Sep 09, 2010 2:04 am

PROUDLIKECOW wrote:cg360, this song is awfully, awesome! The only complaint I would raise up is the hesitancy that makes this song so good. It reminds me of the adage, "think before you speak," and that meditation resonates loudly as you check your blood for poison! It reveals not only your own wonderfully developed mind, but also your concern for others to see that in themselves. Your posts tell me you might be "too" familiar with the phrase, "the fool is known as he opens his mouth." You are no fool! Don't be scared into dimming that mouthpiece!

You scared me there at first! Laughing Thank you! I'll try to drown out the nervousness next time and just post something I feel comfortable with, without the hesitancy!! By the way, I realize that the mind is a large, expansive place filled with thoughts of all kinds (control it!) and that I live in my own little world at times and, perhaps, we all do; but I definitely accessed that strange place for creative needs on this one!! My songs have gotten somewhat darker since I initally starting writing songs in the autumn of 2006. This song is, somewhat, a testament to how far I've come since then Smile

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Loveisalwaysthere! on Thu Sep 09, 2010 2:43 am

Very Happy im not good with long giant post but this was awsome Very Happy!!!
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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Thu Sep 09, 2010 3:01 am

Loveisalwaysthere! wrote:Very Happy im not good with long giant post but this was awsome Very Happy!!!

lol Thank you Very Happy

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Loveisalwaysthere! on Thu Sep 09, 2010 3:09 am

your welcom good luck Smile
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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Thu Sep 09, 2010 6:48 am

Loveisalwaysthere! wrote:your welcom good luck Smile

Thank you! Good to luck to you, too Smile

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Krissy on Thu Sep 09, 2010 6:51 am

Goodluck..very nice

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Thu Sep 09, 2010 11:13 am

butterflycry2010 wrote:Goodluck..very nice

Thanks! Good luck to you, too Smile

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Thu Sep 09, 2010 11:34 am

Just sent in my cover letter! (298/300 words, I think! Razz) And thanks again, everyone, for the feedback!!

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Krissy on Fri Sep 10, 2010 6:28 am

goodluck

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Guest on Fri Sep 10, 2010 7:46 am

cool

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Fri Sep 10, 2010 9:43 am

beautiful_inside09 wrote:cool

Thanks! Smile

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Guest on Fri Sep 10, 2010 10:05 am

yw.wish you a lucky charm!

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Fri Sep 10, 2010 1:53 pm

beautiful_inside09 wrote:yw.wish you a lucky charm!

Haha, thanks!! Laughing

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by YetiMoonchild on Fri Sep 10, 2010 4:05 pm

Awesome C! Good work (:
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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by TheBlueJayStar on Fri Sep 10, 2010 6:00 pm

woah! this could be like a real song! i bet it would sound awesome(r) with a tune and guitar and stuff!
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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Iridescent_Revival_<3 on Sat Sep 11, 2010 4:53 pm

TheBlueJayStar wrote:woah! this could be like a real song! i bet it would sound awesome(r) with a tune and guitar and stuff!

DITTO!!! I love you Very Happy I love you
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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Loveisalwaysthere! on Sat Sep 11, 2010 4:59 pm

yeah...mabey if its really good kerli could sing it Very Happy :3 that would be cool...
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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Sat Sep 11, 2010 5:26 pm

YetiMoonchild wrote:Awesome C! Good work (:

Thanks!! Smile

Iridescent_Revival_<3 wrote:
TheBlueJayStar wrote:woah! this could be like a real song! i bet it would sound awesome(r) with a tune and guitar and stuff!
DITTO!!! I love you Very Happy I love you

That was what I was going for Very Happy

Loveisalwaysthere! wrote:yeah...mabey if its really good kerli could sing it Very Happy :3 that would be cool...

OMG! My dream!! Surprised

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by pixiedust19 on Sun Sep 12, 2010 10:14 am

that was great!!
good luck!

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Sun Sep 12, 2010 10:25 am

pixiedust19 wrote:that was great!! good luck!

Thanks so much!! Very Happy

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Loveisalwaysthere! on Mon Sep 13, 2010 6:09 pm

^^ Laughing that would eb cool if she did Very Happy.....hmmm....eee!!! i cant wait for the results good luck!! *shakes hand* x3
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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Tue Sep 14, 2010 11:12 am

Loveisalwaysthere! wrote:^^ Laughing that would eb cool if she did Very Happy.....hmmm....eee!!! i cant wait for the results good luck!! *shakes hand* x3

*shakes hand back* Laughing

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Loveisalwaysthere! on Tue Sep 14, 2010 2:42 pm

Laughing
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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Tue Sep 14, 2010 5:08 pm

Loveisalwaysthere! wrote:Laughing

lol Smile

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Loveisalwaysthere! on Wed Sep 15, 2010 2:29 am

kittens Idea
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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Wed Sep 15, 2010 7:14 am

Loveisalwaysthere! wrote:kittens Idea

Really? I thought I would a get the words "tacos" or "pudding" thrown around at me on here! *pauses* Mmm... Tacos... Razz

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Natt on Wed Sep 15, 2010 12:26 pm

WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is wonderful, your idea is awesome!!!!!
What was your inspiration?
Good Luck!!!
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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Wed Sep 15, 2010 4:54 pm

KerliKoivPoland wrote:WOW!!!!!!!!!!!! This is wonderful, your idea is awesome!!!!! What was your inspiration? Good Luck!!!

Thank you! Inspiration is all around me Wink As I just posted on your submission thread, we all need to let our hearts do the writing Very Happy

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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by Natt on Thu Sep 16, 2010 6:36 am

You're right!!!!
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Re: cg360's Submission

Post by cg360 on Thu Sep 16, 2010 6:58 am

KerliKoivPoland wrote:You're right!!!!

Let the ideas flow Smile

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Re: cg360's Submission

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